Decisions and Cleansing.

So lately I have been eating healthy and working out which has really opened my eyes onto how I have been treating my body lately which is just not okay. If you watch my vlogs on Youtube you already know about my cleansing and such so this is a piece of cake. Anyway, as cliché as it sounds by eating healthier I have seen a whole new perspective on life itself by choosing this healthy lifestyle. Basically I have found any old ties I may have had with people (bad ones in this case) and I have mended all of them, or at least the ones that I could actually fix because believe it or not its a hard task to do. Just think about it, how many people in your whole life have you crossed? Maybe not that many but getting the courage to fix any problems you've left un-mended is a big deal for anyone.

I fixed some issues with an old friend which turned out delightful and we ended up seeing each other the next day, and it wasn't the kind of hang out where you compare each other to one another to see who turned out better than the other, it was genuine and awesome. So not only have I been cleansing my body but also my brain and soul.

As for decisions. This month has been relatively hard for me, mainly just finally making a decision for once. If you know me you know that I am slightly indecisive (but I have gotten better over the years) and making decisions, much less HUGE LIFE DECISIONS don't come easy for me. So everyone knows I am going to VSU to become a Speech Pathologist where I will spend two years undergrad and two for my masters where I would then get a job in a school system or hospital (or so this has been my plan for over 5-6 years). 

I have always known what I have wanted to do ever since high-school so I have researched it and talked to many Speech Language pathologist. After thinking about it for 5 years I felt pretty comfortable making a life decision as that but now everything has changed in an instant.

So this is pretty embarrassing but it's the truth so I will say it.  In freshman year, spring semester I took over 17 hours, I'm pretty sure it was 18 to be exact which is quite a few. 19 is the max. Anyway I wanted to get ahead of the game and be ready for Speech Path when it came so I took the millions of classes and did awful. Half of the classes I got Cs in and the rest I can't remember. I was so STRESSED that semester I was literally thinking about quitting school. As glad as I am to not have quit it RUINED my GPA completely. There was no going back. No amount of money could pay to erase my mistakes. I lost Hope and ultimately lost a year to make it up. To get into Speech Pathology courses you must have a GPA of 3.0 min. and once you get into the courses if you go under the GPA you will be kicked out of the program. So the next year (my 2nd) I actually did really well to bring up my GPA but it wasn't enough, so I had to come up with a back up plan to spend my next upcoming year since I couldn't get into my classes, so I decided on a bus ride randomly that I was going to do a minor in deaf studies which would take up my summer and a lot of my next year.

During this year I made a ton of friends who are like my family now and we help each other out which assignments and signs and I became the Vice President of ASL Club which was a huge deal to me! This whole year I have been fighting with myself back and forth whether I should switch my major or not whether this was what I was meant to do. A lot of things scared me especially since I didn't know much about the Major or the job field in general. But after learning about Deaf Culture, learning ASL 1,2,3 and 4, and making my first deaf friends I feel like this was almost what I was meant to do. There are 4-5 schools in the state of Georgia that offer Speech Path but only one that offers Interpreting. Could this be a sign that I just ended up here?

I have been extremely confused and upset that after this year I could never be with my ASL friends ever again. But if I  choose this I feel like everything I have worked for would be down the drain? And it makes me kind of mad that if I would've made this decision sooner I could've been graduating next year. But I am one who believes that everything happens for a reason. I still haven't made my final decision but I know that either way I will be happy with what I choose.

For now,
Signing off..... xoxo. sara beth